The good, the bad and the completely unexpected

I have worked my entire adult life and loved it...i would actually enjoy getting dressed up and riding the T and feeling like I had a purpose and enjoyed meeting new people and actually met one of my best friends through work...I can honestly say i never thought i'd end up where I am now, as a stay-at-home mom. Now i try my best to keep an 18 month old entertained enough to feel like i am accomplishing something....below is a fine example...homemade finger painting.



I love that i don't have to wake my son up to get ready for daycare, I love that he rarely gets sick (no more pin worms, pink eye and runny noses for us thank you very much) and I love that I spend more time with him than I do at work. Since i've been with him he has given up his binky, started sitting at the table to eat with us (no more baby high chairs for us!) and rarely needs his lovey blanket....overall he's a much happier little boy and I can see that every single day..

I dislike that I rarely get a break, I am very worried that he doesn't get much interaction from other children and I'm terrified that I won't be able to teach him what he will need to learn. I'm also secretly terrified that because i watch so much t.v that i'm doing permanent damage to him. The main issue is that I get one shot to make him a good person....to take some credit or i guess take the blame if and when things go terribly wrong...I don't want to pass down bad traits that I inherited..#1 being my sometimes short fuse and tendency to yell...that's been passed down for 3 generations and truly hope i can stop for my grandchildren's sake.

I did not expect to gain 10 lbs. I never in my wildest dreams thought i would get more excercise in my working days but i must have because here I am...walking daily, I thought I was eating better but when i go to put on my summer clothes. tight. uncomfortable tight. 10 lbs. i have no idea how it happened. I did not expect to have so many moments with him where I feel so completely fulfilled and blissfully happy. Yesterday he was covered in slobber and we wrestled on the floor with callum trying to kiss me and get the slop all over me. we both laughed until it hurt...I did not expect to also feel so defeated sometimes.

It it stay-at-home mom code to always be grateful for the opportunity and I am, truly. I am a blessed woman to have a husband I love more than the day I married him and a son i would do anything for...I guess working and parenting both has its ups and downs and we have to learn everyday....guess we'll see what today holds!! We're going to try to go to our first movie together!! god i feel bad for the other kids at Tower City cinemas today!!!

My Boys

My Boys

Our Reasons...

To start this blog you should know how we got here and why it's for a year...

Before my son was born i was under the assumption that as a new mom i would spend 6 blissful and sleep-deprived weeks with my boy then be ready to return to the rat race and not miss a beat, i couldn't have been more wrong. I suppose my mother could have warned my husband and I that we couldn't understand how we would feel until he was born but as new parents to be you can't really hear or understand that which she clearly knew and decided to let us figure it out on our own.

We started with daycare and were disappointed, we relied on friends and family and found an wonderful opportunity to have in-home care. I won't go into the details of what happened but it changed me as a human being and as a mother and from that moment on we decided we would work extremely hard and hope and pray my husband would make enough or be given an opportunity to make it possible for me to stay at home.

Our prayers were answered in April of this year, my husband was offered a new job and along with it came a transfer to Cleveland, Ohio. We packed up our first home and headed west.

The reason I say this is for a year is because we have signed a year lease to rent our house and to rent our new fabulous two bedroom downtown apartment and after that year I do not know what the future holds for us...therefore, I am doing to document this 21st century style so hopefully my son can see how hard his father worked to make this possible for us....the sacrifices we are both making to make sure he is safe and happy and thriving and just how much two parents are willing to do to make their son the #1 priority....here we go!